April 29th, 2006, 8:54 am
Wii, Nintendo, Wii?
So the Nintendo Revolution has changed its name yet again. Sigh. First it was the "N5", then the Revolution, and now poof! It's the "Wii".
The entire internet is talking about this, so I figured I'd get in and join the collective cyber-scepticism.
I know plenty of people who just love to judge things based solely on pointless little tidbits. Back in the day, during a shady period of my past where I verged perilously close to becoming the most fears of all geek groups, the Nintendo fanboy, a lot of my would-be peers ridiculed the XBox because it was too big. Simultaneously, I was defending the Purple Cube against Microsoft fanatics who reckoned that it was too small, and that - and this is what throws me, I don't get the logic of this part - because the game discs are smaller, the games aren't as good. Eh?
Just last Wednesday, a friend of mine who is probably reading this right now saw me struggling to locate the correct memory card for Mariokart, because I was too cheap to buy one big memory card and instead have lots of tiny ones, and have not bothered to label them, and made the point - "This is why the XBox is better". What? The problem was brought about by my own tight pocket and lack of organisation, but somehow it makes the Gamecube inadequate? Considering that, even with the 20-or-so gigabyte XBox hard drive, he managed to fill his up with Kotor saves and had to delete information, I'm not sure having totally external memory is so bad an idea. No offense, Tom.
Basic rule - people are stupid. We all are. It's a fact. So a lot of people are going to say "Wii? That sounds stupid, it must be rubbish", and not buy it. I forsee that, at some point in the future, I'm going to have to defend myself against some idiot who is actually trying to persuade me that a console's name has direct correlation with how much fun it is. Oi.
So I set you a task now - considering that neither the names "N5", "Revolution" or "Wii" didn't exactly sum up this console's unique abilities, I want you to try and come up with a new name for it that does. I think it should be called the "Wavy-stick-thing". It's simple and informative, but might not work if they choose to sponsor any more comedy programs on Channel 4 (They do that here in England).
So what's your name for the Wavy-Stick-Thing? Post comments here, and the one I like best gets the glory of a new award I'm designing - a little picture you can use as a signature in a forum, or stick on your MySpace page, or whatever (Oh, how I loath MySpace. But that's a different story).